Posts Tagged ‘communication’
Hot male celebs having extra marital affairs seems to be Hollywood’s newest trend. You can find the stories just about everywhere: Tiger Woods sleeping with multiple women, Jesse James’ affair with a controversial ‘model’, Tiki Barber, who has reportedly left his 8 month pregnant wife for an intern, and even John Edwards, who admits to not only cheating on his cancer stricken wife, but also fathering a child with a willing participant. But, cheating doesn’t discriminate; both men and women can be victims.
If you’ve ever considered an affair, it’s best if you first weigh the downsides to the initial thrill and excitement you may be feeling. This behavior may signify an underlying insecurity that you haven’t dealt with yet like depression, fear of invalidation or commitment issues. Below are some possible causes and solutions for cheating:
- Marriage- You married someone who you weren’t 100% in love with, thinking that eventually your feelings would blossom and grow. Before you find your sexual urges wandering outside the marriage to quench your lusting thirst for someone else, look to your spouse for excitement and try to determine the source of your emotional issues first.
- Communication- Once you realize the reasons your thoughts or actions led you to look toward that sexy intern at the office or the handsome, hot bodied landscaper, have a conversation with your husband or wife. Sometimes just talking about your needs in the relationship can quickly fix the things that are going wrong.
- Counseling- Some unions require additional support to work through the problems. Your insurance company may provide coverage to assist with the cost, but if not, there are community organizations and centers, or perhaps churches and synagogues, that have programs for couples. Getting help could strengthen your bond and save your marriage.
- Separation- If you’ve explored all of your options and still can’t find common ground, it could be that the marriage really wasn’t meant to be. Before choosing to cheat, discuss the option of separation. Time apart will give you the opportunity to examine your inner self and discover why you got married to your spouse in the first place. If separating doesn’t work, it’s better to part ways than to risk hurting your spouse with a fling.
No matter what path you choose, extra marital affairs can only lead to pain and heartache. You married for a reason, so before stepping out, take a moment to step back in and look at your lives from a different perspective. Be open with your spouse about your feelings and if you still see no future, end the relationship before moving on.
Please share your relationship story. Sometimes just writing it down can lead to a positive solution.
Will Reggie Bush and Kim Kardashian make it? With Kim being the sophisticated business woman/celebrity and Reggie being a Pro Footballer with a Super Bowl ring you would think they were a lock- but it seems that Reggie is still just a big kid at heart according to a recent PopEater post. They recently went on a Costa Rica vacation to ‘decide’ whether to work at their love life or end it altogether. They’ve chosen the break up, at least for now.
Have you ever been in a relationship with someone who is more immature than you? For instance, you’re a successful business person who is used to being in charge while your significant other prefers to simply take it easy, hang with friends, and not care about responsibilities or bills with the same passion as you do. Does this sound harmonious or do you wish that they would take some initiative? If you’re with someone who needs a push, here are some great tips to get you on your way to a better bond:
- Dating: Even though you’ve committed to a serious relationship it’s important to physically plan time each week to spend together. Make sure that you both take turns on date night ideas so that each of you gets the most out of your time together.
- Communication: Plan a time where you can spend at least an hour or two together writing up a list of what you want to talk about. Then, one by one, talk…and listen! You may discover that your mate’s lack of maturity has more to do with complacency or even boredom. Make sure that you both are part of the decision making process.
- Compromise: If both of you have agreed to commit to a relationship overhaul, then you must be willing to bend a little on personal choices like where his favorite chair gets to sit and how much more of that closet you actually need.
A relationship works both ways. You give and you get. If you’re doing all the giving and getting nothing in return, it may be time to re-evaluate your current status. If there’s room to grow, start with communicating your issues and listening to theirs. If Kim and Reggie take this type of approach, they might be surprised at how much better their relationship could be. Good Luck!
Related Links: Love Lessons for Commit Phobes